Hangovers are never easy to deal with.
But it’s even worse when your best friend calls you at nine in the morning to cry about how much they fucked up the previous night.
“I kissed him!” Sehun almost shouts into the phone. “Hyung... What do I do? I can’t show up at the office anymore!”
“Don’t be so dramatic.” Kyungsoo sighs as he rubs at his throbbing temples. “You both wanted it; where’s the problem?”
“Alright first of all, if anyone finds out, we’ll both get fired. Did you forget that dating within our workplace isn’t allowed?
“Taemin wouldn’t fire you over something like that, Sehun.”
“And I wanted to ask Joohyun out soon. And Junmyeon’s almost five years older than me! He’s like an old stuffy man and he always shouts at me even if I didn’t do anything wrong! He’ll probably kill me on Monday! Fuck! Why am I such a horny brat? I should’ve gone home after the dinner was over.”
Kyungsoo sits up in his bed and squints at the light that streams in from his open bedroom door. Everything spins for a moment before it evens out into a dull pounding sensation at the back of his head. “Why are you telling me this? I don’t know anything about relationships. Also don’t even think about asking Joohyun out.”
“Because you’re my best friend! Who else am I supposed to ask?” Sehun groans. “And why not? She likes me.”
“Sehun... look, can we talk on Monday? I’m still half asleep.”
His friend sighs on the other end and there’s some rustling, like he’s in bed too. “Okay, but one more thing. What happened with Jongin?”
Kyungsoo suddenly freezes.
Yes, what happened with Jongin?
He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to remember last night, and he comes up with images of him and Jongin talking at the bar for hours, of Jongin laughing and finally, how he told Jongin about the orphanage.
“We talked.” He mutters.
“Is he going to help you with the orphanage?”
“I don’t know. You dragged me away when I told him about it.”
“Oh. Okay. Sorry.” Sehun grumbles something under his breath. “Well, does he like you?”
“How should I know?!”
“Do you think he’s going to help you or not?!”
“I don’t know!”
“Why are you shouting?!”
Kyungsoo groans and buries himself back into his blankets. “I’m hanging up. I can’t handle your voice right now.”
“Right back at you.” Sehun snorts and then, when Kyungsoo is silent he mumbles “I didn’t mean that. I love you, hyung.”
Kyungsoo grunts and hangs up, frowning when he catches a whiff of something that smells like a dead animal.
It’s himself.
He needs to take a shower.
Kyungsoo doesn’t know what he’s supposed to expect when he arrives at the office on Monday.
Now that he’s fully sober again, he feels rather anxious to see Jongin again. In all honesty, he expects the boy to just ignore him, probably regretting that he told Kyungsoo so much about himself while he was drunk.
He hopes that it isn’t the case because he still needs Jongin’s help and he thinks they got closer on Friday night more than he would’ve expected.
The office is still locked when Kyungsoo arrives at the building since it’s only half past eight.
And like the week before, while his computer is starting up the elevator doors slide open and Jongin steps inside.
Kyungsoo holds his breath and watches the man rub at his eyes sleepily, yawning as he yanks off the beanie from his head. He doesn’t notice Kyungsoo or the opening sound of his computer since he’s wearing earphones again and Kyungsoo just observes how he walks away and to his office.
He releases the breath he was holding, cursing himself for being so nervous over nothing. They just talked, like every other normal person would have. There’s nothing wrong with that.
Just as Kyungsoo is about to log into his account Jongin comes back, still looking half asleep and his hair isn’t as neat as it usually is either. This time though he isn’t wearing his earphones and he notices Kyungsoo when he lifts his head, still rubbing at his eyes groggily.
“Kyungsoo.” He says and Kyungsoo tenses up for unknown reasons upon hearing him say his name. “Were you there before?” He tilts his head, looking confused and together with his puffy eyes Kyungsoo can understand why Baekhyun calls him adorable.
“Yes.” Kyungsoo says and he can’t help it when the corners of his lips twitch, wanting to smile.
Jongin approaches his desk slowly, looking a little bashful. “I’m sorry. I guess I’m still a bit sleepy... Good morning.”
“Good morning.”
They look at each other in silence and Kyungsoo wants to wince from how awkward it suddenly is, with both of them sober again and back to their closed off personalities. “Uhm... do you want to grab some coffee?” Jongin asks and then proceeds to pull a pained face at his question since the coffee room is only a few feet away.
“Sure.” Kyungsoo usually doesn’t smile this much. Especially not in the morning, but the way Jongin is acting right now makes him want to smile so the man doesn’t feel so tense around him.
“Did you have a nice weekend?” Jongin asks while he hands Kyungsoo a clean cup from the cupboard.
Kyungsoo nods as he places his cup underneath the coffee machine. “The hangover wasn’t that fun though.”
Jongin chuckles while mirroring Kyungsoo’s actions. “You’re telling me.”
They fall into silence again while their coffees are brewing. Kyungsoo looks at Jongin without turning his head, having to look up because of the height difference. Jongin looks like he’s ready to fall asleep again and Kyungsoo thought about it a lot during the weekend, how people have this weird image of Jongin, that he’s a playboy, a womanizer, hence why so many people are so keen on being with him.
It seems animalistic, really, because Jongin doesn’t seem to be anything like the people make him out to be.
“Hey... Kyungsoo?” Jongin rips him out of his thoughts.
“Yes?”
“I don’t know if you remember but you told me something on Friday before you left... And it wouldn’t leave my mind over the weekend. I don’t know if you were just drunk or-“
“You mean about the orphanage?” Kyungsoo cuts in.
Jongin hesitates, then nods his head. “How are my parents related to that?”
Kyungsoo studies his face, looking for something that might give away that Jongin’s playing, that he’s just feigning innocence when he knows very well what Kyungsoo is talking about. “You really don’t know?”
“I’m honestly just confused. What is there to know?”
And maybe Kyungsoo shouldn’t tell him. There must be a reason as to why Jongin still doesn’t know about it but he can’t find it in himself to care. That’s his parents’ problems, his own problems are more important right now.
They sit down at one of the round tables close to the window. It’s raining outside and Kyungsoo tells Jongin everything there is to know. Just like on Friday, Jongin listens to him patiently without interrupting, his attention full on Kyungsoo.
He asks a few questions from time to time and it’s then that Kyungsoo notices that Jongin has a habit.
He rubs at the skin behind his ear with his fingers whenever he’s talking. Kyungsoo doesn’t know if it’s because he’s nervous or if he’s concentrating or if he just does it out of comfort. He did it four times in the span of a minute and it’s one of those things that once you notice it, you can’t really pay attention to anything else. So every time he does it, Kyungsoo’s mind blanks out for a second and he loses track of whatever he is saying.
Jongin licks his lips while he’s speaking. A lot. And while his other mannerism is quite harmless and some people would even go as far as calling it cute, this is just making him a really damn unpleasant conversational partner.
Kyungsoo tries not to look but it’s like the wet muscle is some kind of magnet and his eyes seem to be drawn to it every time it darts out to wet those lips.
“I didn’t know about any of this.” Jongin sighs once Kyungsoo has told him everything. “There must be a reason why my father did what he did. He’s not a bad person.”
“I’m not saying he is.” Kyungsoo shrugs and wraps his fingers around his cup. “But he obviously didn’t think about how much harm he would cause.”
Jongin looks at him for a while and he has this look in his eyes, like he’s accusing Kyungsoo of something and it rubs him the wrong way. “Of course you’re going to side with your parents.” He huffs, causing Jongin to frown at him.
“I didn’t say that.” Jongin ruffles a hand through his hair and it sticks up into the air. It makes him look a lot younger and Kyungsoo feels the tension ebb out of his shoulders despite him being annoyed.
Jongin stares at him again and unlike every other person Kyungsoo knows, the boy doesn’t look away after a few seconds.
“Quit staring at me.”
Jongin laughs at his irritated expression and Kyungsoo clears his throat when his eyes get stuck on Jongin’s smile for too long. “Kyungsoo?”
There’s no need for Jongin to say his name so much. It makes Kyungsoo feel restless. “Yes?”
“Why do you care about that orphanage so much?”
Kyungsoo freezes upon hearing the question and if Jongin notices it, he doesn’t say anything about it. “I’ve been friends with the caretakers for a long time.” The lie slips out easily.
“That’s it?”
“It’s not easy not to care about those kids once you’ve met them, you know.” Kyungsoo looks into Jongin’s dark eyes and Jongin looks right back, the ticking of the clock and the sound of rain splattering against the windows the only thing disturbing the silence around them.
“Can I meet them?” Jongin suddenly asks.
“You want to meet the children?” Kyungsoo squints his eyes at him and Jongin nods.
“And the caretakers too.”
“Why?”
“Am I not allowed to?” Jongin looks worried. “I mean, if it’s not appropriate then I’m sorry for asking. I’ve never been in an orphanage before...”
“No, no that’s not it. I mean, you can, if you want.” Kyungsoo still looks at him warily.
“I honestly just want to meet them. Don’t look at me like that.”
Kyungsoo nibbles at his lower lip. “Are you serious?”
Jongin nods.
Kyungsoo looks at him and tries to figure out if it’s a good idea to take Jongin there. Then again, if he wants Jongin to help him he needs to make him sympathize with the kids and that’s not going to happen unless he meets them, is it?
“I was thinking about going there tomorrow after work. I could tell them that I’m taking a friend with me.”
“A friend?” Jongin flashes him a smile that catches Kyungsoo off guard with how bright it is.
“I have to tell them something, right?” Kyungsoo mumbles but it doesn’t make Jongin smile at him any less.
Kyungsoo pushes his chair back and leaves without another word, pretending not to hear the quiet chuckle leaving Jongin’s lips on his way out.
Kyungsoo drops the Brussels sprouts into Sehun’s plate and moves the broccoli from Sehun’s to his own.
His friend makes an agreeing noise but keeps pushing the food around with his chopsticks.
“Aren’t you going to eat?” Kyungsoo asks.
Sehun looks horrible today, like he hasn’t slept at all and he’s strangely quiet too.
Kyungsoo feels a bit lost without the boy’s constant annoying voice holding him back from his work.
“Sehun.” He pokes him with his chopstick and Sehun only grunts. He swats him away like the brat he is. “Is this about Friday night?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
Kyungsoo sighs and picks up a Brussels sprout to press it against Sehun’s lips. A gloomy Sehun is hard to handle as it is, Kyungsoo doesn’t need a hungry one on top of that. “Open your mouth!” He hisses when Sehun refuses to part his lips. Sehun eventually gives in and Kyungsoo pushes the nasty vegetable into his mouth.
He and Junmyeon ran into each other this morning at the restroom and the man couldn’t even look at Kyungsoo in the eyes when he greeted him.
“Hey babies.” Baekhyun sits down next to Kyungsoo and places his tray on the table. “Uhm. Who died?” He asks once he spots Sehun’s expression.
“Sehun’s dignity.” Kyungsoo pops a piece of broccoli into his mouth, ignoring the burning glare Sehun sends his way.
Baekhyun chuckles and opens his bottle of apple juice. “Oh, I see... Can I ask you something?”
“What?” Sehun snaps.
“Does he have a big dick?” Baekhyun whispers, leaning closer. “I heard people with the last name Kim are hung as hell!”
“W-What?” Sehun’s face suddenly resembles a ripe tomato. “You fucking pervert! I didn’t see his dick!”
Baekhyun laughs while Sehun looks like he’s ready to strangle him with his tie. “I’m just teasing you, Hunnie. But seriously, do you like him or no?”
“I don’t want to talk about this right now.” Sehun sighs. He rarely gets like this. The last time he was so down was when his puppy Vivi ran away.
“Are you sure?” Kyungsoo asks.
“Yep. Let’s talk about you and Jongin instead since you wouldn’t tell me anything on the phone.” Just like that, Sehun is back to his usual self, digging into his food like a starving man and Kyungsoo wonders how he does that.
“Yeah, you guys talked for hours at the club!” Baekhyun speaks through a mouth full of food. “You must’ve impressed him! Jongin never talks to anyone for more than a few minutes at a stretch.”
Kyungsoo shrugs. “He was quite drunk.”
“Doesn’t matter. You told him about the orphanage, right? What did he say?”
“Nothing. He said he didn’t know about it.” Kyungsoo explains, looking around the lunch room to make sure Jongin isn’t here. It’s not really necessary because Jongin never eats his lunch here, he always eats in his office.
“As if.” Sehun snorts. “What did you say? Did you ask him to talk to his parents?”
“No, of course not, you idiot. That would be too obvious.” Baekhyun rolls his eyes and dodges the dirty napkin Sehun throws in his direction with a warning glare.
“I’m taking him to the orphanage tomorrow.” Kyungsoo says and Baekhyun’s head snaps around so fast Kyungsoo worries that idiot’s going to give himself whiplash. Sehun meanwhile nearly chokes on a piece of beef.
“What?!” Sehun coughs wildly. Baekhyun reaches out to pat his back but it looks like he’s trying to punch Sehun instead. The boy makes a pained noise and slaps his hand away with a freaked out expression. “Hyung! It took me an entire year until you took me to the orphanage, what the fuck?!”
“Hey, no, Sehun this is great!” Baekhyun says. “This is perfect! It will break Jongin’s heart when he sees the children and then he’ll have to talk to his parents.”
Kyungsoo looks down at his plate and feels the same feeling from Friday night gnaw at his chest. His gut drenched in something filthy that feels very much like guilt.
“Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun sighs upon noticing him frowning. “You don’t have to feel guilty for using him. Jongin isn’t as innocent as you might think.”
This only makes Kyungsoo frown harder. Baekhyun’s confusing as hell. A while ago he was worshipping Jongin’s entire being and now it’s like he’s trying to get him back for something. Probably for not giving in to his romantic advances. “What do you mean?”
Baekhyun quickly scans the room before he leans closer, like he’s about to tell them a secret. “A few months back he got into a fight at a club. Apparently he beat a guy up so bad he had to be hospitalized for days.”
Sehun snorts, shaking his head. “Bullshit, that would’ve been all over the news.”
“Oh, come on! Do you think his father would’ve allowed that? Chanyeol told me everything. They paid the witnesses and the kid half a fortune for him to keep their mouths shut.”
Kyungsoo doesn’t know what to think of that. Sure, Baekhyun has a huge mouth and tends to bullshit from time to time but he isn’t one to spread false rumors. He finds it hard to imagine Jongin beating someone up but he isn’t stupid enough to judge people based on first impressions.
“I find that hard to believe. I mean, I don’t like the guy either but he seems like too much of a momma’s boy if you ask me.”
“Why would you think that?” Baekhyun scoffs and shakes his head. “No, look, he has an aggression problem or something. He used to throw these crazy tantrums as a kid where he’d scream and kick around until he calmed down. He had a horrible stutter too and was bullied like crazy at school because of it-“
“Baek, stop.” Kyungsoo interrupts, feeling angry and upset that Baekhyun just told them all of this. It feels like he shouldn’t know any of that - if it happens to be true. “Why would Chanyeol tell you any of this?”
“He was drunk and... I might’ve taken advantage of that? Look, I only did it for you Kyungsoo!” Baekhyun shrugs and at least he has the decency to look guilty when Kyungsoo glares at him.
“Don’t- just don’t tell those things to anyone else. I’m serious Baekhyun. That’s too private.”
“God, okay. I was only planning on telling you guys anyways.” Baekhyun assures him.
“Wow.” Sehun raises his eyebrows as he leans back in his chair. “Who would’ve thought our ice prince was a fucking nutcase underneath all that beauty?” He snorts.
Kyungsoo feels his chest tighten even more.
Was this how Sehun would’ve talked behind his back too if they weren’t friends?
Because he knows very well that other people would be talking exactly like this about Kyungsoo too if they knew that he was nothing but worthless trash from the streets.
“He’s not a nutcase.” Baekhyun mumbles, almost like he actually feels guilty for revealing all that stuff about Jongin. “I think they send him to therapy so he could get his anger under control. Chanyeol told me it’s why he’s so quiet all the time. Like he’s scared he’s going to blow up like a grenade-“ Baekhyun stops talking when Kyungsoo pushes his chair back, clearly fed up with the conversation. “Okay, okay. I’m done talking. Geez, you’re so sensitive...”
“Just be careful with him tomorrow, hyung.” Sehun says as he chews on that little green vegetable that tastes like poison to Kyungsoo. “I don’t trust him.”
“I’m always careful.” Kyungsoo sighs as he picks up his tray.
He doesn’t see Jongin again until the office is almost empty and Kyungsoo is packing his thing to leave.
Jongin is standing at the reception, talking to Miyoung (who is probably the only girl at the office that doesn’t throw herself at the boy at every given chance).
He takes his time in clearing his desk so he doesn’t end up interrupting their conversation which definitely would happen since they’re practically standing in front of the elevator.
Miyoung smiles brightly and waves at Jongin before she turns around and walks away effortlessly on her high heels. Kyungsoo watches Jongin, expecting the man to look after her like every other guy at the office does but he doesn’t. Instead he looks up and spots Kyungsoo standing there and Kyungsoo feels strangely caught.
He shoulders his bag and makes his way towards the elevator, giving Jongin a quick smile as he presses the button. “Aren’t you leaving?”
Jongin shakes his head, his hand coming up to rub at the skin behind his ear again and, for some reason, it makes Kyungsoo want to smile. He was expecting it to happen after noticing it this morning. “I have to help Taemin prepare tomorrow’s meeting.”
Jongin always stays until late at the office. The skin underneath his eyes looks very thin, probably from how much he works.
Kyungsoo can’t help but think about Baekhyun’s words as his eyes sweep over Jongin’s face mindlessly. Nothing about him looks harsh or violent. Instead, Jongin looks like a kid that’s being forced into a suit to make him look like an adult. His shoulders seem tense, like he’s trying to keep them straight instead of how slumped Kyungsoo has seen him walk around twice, when Jongin thought that no one was watching him.
He tries to imagine Jongin as a child, how he got teased for his stutter and something twists in his chest at the thought.
“Is something wrong?” Jongin asks when Kyungsoo stares at him for too long.
Kyungsoo shakes his head. “No. Sorry, I was thinking about something.”
Jongin nods and his eyes move to the clock on the wall behind Kyungsoo. “Tomorrow... Is it still on? I mean. I kind of invited myself. I didn’t mean to.”
Did he really beat someone up? Jongin can barely look him in the eyes right now, how is someone like him supposed to raise a hand against anyone?
“Hyung?”
Kyungsoo looks at him with wide eyes, cursing himself for getting lost in his thoughts again. It’s also the first time Jongin has called him that. It’s only natural, since Kyungsoo is two years older but it also suddenly reminds him awfully much of Taeil from the orphanage.
Taeil also stutters so Kyungsoo has seen him getting teased by the other kids a lot. He’s had to hold the little boy more often than not when he was crying about them calling him weird names.
“Sorry.” Kyungsoo sighs. “No, it’s okay. I already told them you’d come along.”
“Okay, then.” Jongin bites at his lips and Kyungsoo deliberately keeps his gaze on Jongin’s eyes. “Should I pick you up? I don’t know where it is...”
“Uhm. I was thinking we would just go there straight after work? The kids have to go to bed at eight. I thought you might want to have some time with them before.”
“Oh! Y-Yes, absolutely.”
Jongin stuttered.
Kyungsoo doesn’t know why he suddenly feels so horrible but he does.
“If you want, I can make Sehun pick me up in the morning so I can leave my car at home or... I could pick you up, I guess-“
“No, no that’s fine. I can drop you off after.”
“Okay then.” Kyungsoo nods and Jongin nods too. He rolls his sleeves up and Kyungsoo accidentally spots the smudge of something black on Jongin’s wrist and on the side of his hand.
Kyungsoo used to have those marks back in college when he wrote his assignments by hand. Though, he isn’t sure why Jongin would have such a marks now. It’s not like they write papers and reports with a quill and parchment.
“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Jongin steps back without turning around and Kyungsoo takes a second too long to tear his eyes away from Jongin’s hand.
The boy notices his gaze and not so subtly hides it behind his back which only serves to increase Kyungsoo’s confusion.
“Yeah.” Kyungsoo looks up. He tries to figure out why Jongin felt the need to hide his hand but his expression is unreadable all of a sudden. His eyes are guarded in the exact same way they are when he’s around people who are trying to get something out of him. It leaves Kyungsoo’s stomach in knots because he obviously is not one of them.
And then he realizes that he is.
“Okay. Bye, hyung.” Jongin smiles briefly and then - without waiting for Kyungsoo to speak - turns around and walks away.
Kyungsoo stares at his retreating back as his own shoulders slump in defeat.
He is trying to get something out of Jongin.
He’s no better than them.
Not one bit.
The next day, he doesn’t see Jongin until the evening.
He couldn’t really sleep last night. Which isn’t anything new since he suffers from insomnia most nights but normally there isn’t a tangible source for his lack of his sleep.
However, last night he kept thinking about Jongin, and his family, and the black smudge on his hand which his mind - for some reason - deemed important enough to ponder about.
It’s not like the things Baekhyun told them about Jongin’s past were extremely touching.
Kyungsoo has seen and experienced too many things for him to be moved by a trivial story like Jongin’s. There are a lot of people in the world that most certainly experienced the same things in their past.
What kept him awake all night was the guilt.
He kept tossing around, annoyed and frustrated because there’s no reason for him to be feeling guilty. It’s not his fault that other people treat Jongin like some kind of price, like it’s all some kind of sick competition.
He doesn’t owe that kid anything.
Yet when he can’t spot the man around the office all morning, his fingers itch and his head pounds from how much he has to fight the urge to just walk up to Jongin’s office and tell him the truth. That he doesn’t want him to come to the orphanage and that he doesn’t want his help.
But Kyungsoo bites his tongue and furiously writes his quarterly report. He thinks about Naeun’s cute laugh and Taeil’s imitation of the Hulk in order not to give in.
“You’re not chickening out, right?” Sehun asks while he’s getting ready to leave too.
“Why would I?” Kyungsoo is reading the same sentence for the nth time. It doesn’t make any sense whatsoever. He honestly doesn’t know where his head is.
“Because you keep glancing at the guy’s door every two seconds.”
“I’m not backing out, Sehun.”
“Okay. Just making sure.” Sehun throws a crumpled up post-it into the trash can and then stands in front of Kyungsoo’s desk. “If he tries anything funny you better call me. If he starts to drive you somewhere secluded when he’s dropping you off call the fucking police, you hear me?”
Kyungsoo looks up and snorts. “I can take care of myself, you know, and stop being so paranoid.”
Sehun shrugs. “It’s called being careful. You should try it some time.”
“Go home.” Kyungsoo kicks his legs under the desk.
“Alright.” Sehun laughs and starts walking backwards. “But if you don’t text me once you’re home I’m calling the cops!”
Kyungsoo waves him off and once the elevator doors slide shut behind Sehun, he’s the only person left at the office.
Well, there’s Jongin too because he can still see the light from his office and he doesn’t think Jongin is the type to stand people up.
About ten minutes later, when Kyungsoo is just about to send his report to Taemin’s mail account, the door to Jongin’s office opens. Kyungsoo looks up and sees Jongin shrugging on his coat as he makes his way towards Kyungsoo.
He looks tired, alarmingly so.
“Hi.” Jongin breathes with a little smile once he’s standing in front of Kyungsoo.
“Hey.” Kyungsoo sends the mail and shuts his computer off.
“Do you need a minute or are you ready to go?”
“No, I’m ready.” They walk to the elevator and while they wait for it to arrive Kyungsoo looks to the side and tries to figure out why Jongin looks so tired. “I haven’t seen you all day.”
“Hm?” Jongin looks at him. “Oh. Yeah, Taemin’s really busy because of the meeting with the European members. I’m just trying to help him out. People tend to forget that he’s only twenty- five.”
Kyungsoo nods his head. Jongin’s right though. No one expected Taemin’s father to die so suddenly. To say that he was unprepared when he was thrown the responsibility of taking over
the company would be an understatement. “You look really tired.”
Jongin gives him this strange look again, the same from Friday night. Kyungsoo’s never been good at reading people but it’s even more misleading with Jongin. “Is it that bad?” He chuckles nervously though it’s strained and Kyungsoo simply can’t shake the feeling that there’s something he’s missing.
“No, but you should try to sleep more.” The elevator arrives and Kyungsoo wants to roll his eyes at himself. Like he’s one to talk about getting more sleep.
“I know.” Jongin clears his throat and it’s followed by silence.
Jongin has a BMW I8.
When Kyungsoo spots it he stops walking.
He stares at it like a teenager seeing boobs for the first time.
It shouldn’t surprise him. Jongin’s parents are one of the richest people in the country. They did buy Jongin mansions all over the globe.
But he’s driving a lousy Volkswagen and this car right here is more expensive than his entire being.
Jongin clears his throat. Then, when Kyungsoo manages to tear his gaze away he notices how uncomfortable Jongin looks, when he actually should look smug and tease Kyungsoo about wanting to drive it and whatnot but he’s not.
Kyungsoo tries not to whimper when he sees that the car unlocks with a press of Jongin’s thumb against the door handle. The doors then proceed to open upwards instead of sideways. Kyungsoo gives him an incredulous look and Jongin makes a pained face.
“I feel like I should change my clothes.” Kyungsoo mutters when he’s sitting on the leather seats seconds later.
“Why?” Jongin drives the car out of the parking lot and it feels like the car is gliding over the ground from how smooth the ride is.
“I don’t know. I feel dirty.” Kyungsoo snorts and looks out of the window.
“Don’t say that.” Jongin says, sounding genuinely upset.
They’re silent after that. Kyungsoo probably made Jongin feel uncomfortable and he didn’t mean to. However, he is once again being painfully aware of how incredibly different him and Jongin are.
It’s almost like they’re living in entirely different worlds.
Kyungsoo has to live on nothing but stale rice for entire weeks because the money’s so tight on him while Jongin is driving this car around like it wouldn’t matter if it crashed, as if he had spare ones at home.
Which he probably does.
“I didn’t tell them who you are.” Kyungsoo says after a while. “I mean, they don’t know you’re the son of the man who’s buying the orphanage.”
Since Seulgi and Joohyun both are a couple of years older than Jongin he doesn’t think there’s a chance they would know about Jongin even though younger girls know who the boy is. It’s not like his face is portrayed everywhere like it is with idols.
He also warned the girls not to say anything to Jongin about Kyungsoo being an orphan.
There’s no reason for Jongin to know that.
“Oh.” Jongin clears his throat, clearly uncomfortable again.
“Sorry, I just. It would’ve been weird to them, you know? It’s nothing personal.”
“No, it’s okay. I understand.”
Jongin’s shoulders are tense after that and Kyungsoo sighs tiredly.
He gives Jongin instructions as the man doesn’t know where the orphanage is. Once they’re only minutes away from it he notices that Jongin starts to act a little nervous.
The tight grip on the steering wheel gives him away too.
“You okay?” Kyungsoo asks.
“Yeah. Why are you asking?”
“You’re holding that steering wheel like you’re scared someone’s going to take it from you.” Kyungsoo chuckles but stops once he sees how the tips of Jongin’s ears suddenly start darkening.
It should look funny, with him wearing that neat suit and sitting in the driver’s seat like the car was uniquely made for him. Nonetheless, it’s just one more thing that makes Kyungsoo feel awful about using him. Jongin’s making it really hard for Kyungsoo to not consider his feelings too.
“I’m a bit nervous.” Jongin finally admits. “I’m terrible with people but I’m even worse with kids.”
“Don’t you like children?” Kyungsoo frowns. He knows there are lots of people who can’t stand kids and he has always had a hard time understanding that.
Jongin shakes his head. “No, no I love children. They just don’t like me.”
Kyungsoo can’t help but smile. “Why are you saying that?”
“My cousin has a two-year-old girl. Whenever I try to hold her she cries like she’s in actual pain.” Jongin trails off and Kyungsoo feels like he was slapped in the face because Jongin juts his lower lip out.
He’s pouting and it makes him look like a kicked puppy. Kyungsoo quickly averts his eyes, trying not to freak out about the way his stomach did a dangerous flip inside him because of that.
“That doesn’t mean every child hates you.” Kyungsoo tells him to turn at the next corner. “And I know one of them will definitely like you. His name is Taeil.”
“Why do you think that?”
“I don’t know. I just feel like you’re going to get along.”
Well, it turns out that Taeil is scared of Jongin.
The second they step inside and Kyungsoo announces that he’s there, Naeun and Taeil come running down the stairs like they always do, both of them hugging his legs tightly.
Kyungsoo kneels down to give them both a tight hug. “I brought a friend today. Be nice and say hi to him, will you?”
His chest fills with pride when Naeun shyly walks up to Jongin and does an awkward bow before reaching her hand out. “My name is Naeun and I’m already four years old!”
Jongin gapes at the little girl for a moment, his eyes flickering up to meet Kyungsoo’s who nods his head encouragingly. He tries to make him answer her before the girl gets scared of him. Jongin squats down, which Kyungsoo didn’t expect him to do.
Not many people consider doing it when they’re talking to kids but it’s a great way to get them to open up. It stops adults from coming across as superiors to the kids once the height difference is gone. “Hi Naeun. I’m Jongin. And wow... you’re already four? That’s impressive!”
Naeun’s face lights up in excitement. “Yes! Taeil is only three! I’m his noona!”
Jongin turns to look at the mentioned boy who is currently hiding behind Kyungsoo’s legs. Kyungsoo can see the uncertainty in Jongin’s eyes and decides to help.
“Taeil. Go say hi to Jongin.” He urges the little boy but Taeil shakes his head, hiding even more behind Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo sighs and pats his head. “He’s shy. He’ll warm up to you eventually.”
Jongin nods and smiles down at Naeun who is already reaching for his hand to hold it. Kyungsoo smiles too. She’s always been fast to warm up to people, which isn’t the best thing given the circumstances because it also means she gets attached quickly and that her little heart breaks very easily when someone leaves her.
“Kyungsoo!” Joohyun walks up to them with a bright smile. She hugs Kyungsoo tightly and laughs, pulling away. “I forgot how good you look in a suit.”
Kyungsoo shakes his head. “You look beautiful.”
Joohyun smirks and pinches his cheeks before turning to greet Jongin. “You must be Jongin then? I’m Joohyun.”
“Yes, I am. It’s nice to meet you.” They smile at each other and Kyungsoo, for some reason, waits for Jongin to let his gaze linger on her because Joohyun is one of the most beautiful girls Kyungsoo has ever seen, but Jongin doesn’t.
Instead he turns to look at Naeun and gives her a warm smile which makes the girl shy and hide her face against his leg.
Joohyun takes Taeil’s hand and turns around. “Come on guys. Dinner will be ready in a couple of minutes.”
Jongin looks positively overwhelmed when he sees the huge dinner table.
“How many kids live here?” He whispers.
“Currently, there are nine, two are temporarily in foster homes.” Kyungsoo explains.
“And Joohyun is...?”
“She’s one of the caretakers. There are three in total.”
It’s like Seulgi and Soojin were waiting for him to say that because they walk in with trays full of food seconds later. Both of them smiling brightly when they see Jongin and Kyungsoo standing there.
“Please take your jackets off!” Seulgi laughs, walking over to them. “I feel underdressed because of your suits.”
She introduces herself to Jongin and Kyungsoo doesn’t know why, but he feels relieved that both girls seem to like Jongin from the first impression. Though that’s stupid, he shouldn’t care about their opinion on Jongin.
Jongin seems nervous to greet Soojin. It’s obvious from the deep bow he does but the tension leaves his shoulders as soon as Soojin smiles at him. “What a handsome young man.” She says, patting his cheek and Kyungsoo gets the same feeling he had in the car when Jongin blushes at her words.
Dinner is as crazy as always. It’s basically impossible to make nearly ten kids sit still, stop them from chatting and make sure they’re eating their vegetables but Kyungsoo is used to this and he’d take this over the silent dinners in his cold apartment any day.
The kids keep asking Jongin questions and while Jongin still seems a little nervous there’s a strange glint in his eyes when he talks to all of them and he almost looks happy. The tiredness from before isn’t as evident either.
“How did you and Jongin meet?” Seulgi asks. “You never told us about him before.”
Kyungsoo tenses and looks to his side where Jongin is sitting. He hopes the boy will play along but Jongin beats him to it.
“We work for the same company.” Jongin says. “But I only started a few weeks ago so we haven’t known each other for that long.”
Seulgi nods, shooting a weird smile in Kyungsoo’s direction. “You must be special then, Kyungsoo isn’t just friends with anyone. He usually doesn’t bring them here either.”
Kyungsoo forcefully stabs into his vegetables, feeling his face heat up when even Joohyun smirks at him. They’re getting it all wrong and Jongin seems to notice too because he clears his throat awkwardly and shifts in his seat.
“He didn’t want to.” The boy tries with a nervous smile. “I kind of insisted on coming.”
“Well, you’re welcome to visit anytime you want.” Joohyun smiles but it falls a little towards the end. “At least as long as we’re still here.”
It goes silent on the table despite the kids still laughing and chatting with each other. Jongin looks down at his empty plate, gnawing at his lip. “I’m really sorry about that. Kyungsoo told me.”
Kyungsoo sees him swallow heavily and feels even worse than before because now he isn’t only taking advantage of Jongin, he’s making him feel guilty too.
“There’s nothing that can be done.” Soojin says when she sees all their dejected faces. “We have to make the best out of the situation.”
Jongin doesn’t really look up from his plate for the rest of the meal and Kyungsoo feels a little sick for entirely different reasons than the Brussels sprouts Soojin managed to sneak into his plate.
“He’s really handsome.” Seulgi whispers into his ear later while they’re washing the dishes.
Kyungsoo shrugs his shoulders in response and proceeds to put the leftovers into plastic containers.
“Don’t you think so?”
“I guess.” He mumbles, giving her an irritated look when she keeps staring at him.
She suddenly splashes water into his face. “Seulgi, what the hell?!”
“Don’t make me worm everything out of you!” She harshly whispers. “Why did you bring him here?”
“Because he wanted to see the orphanage!”
“Then why are you acting so nervous around each other?”
“We’re not!”
“He kept glancing at you during dinner.”
“No-”
Jongin didn’t do that.
Did he?
“Is there something going on between the two of you?” Seulgi asks, more serious now. “It took you over a year to bring your friend Sehun.”
“Of course not!” Kyungsoo blushes furiously at the question and walks over to the fridge to put the containers in. “We’re just colleagues. And what makes you think I’d be into guys?”
Seulgi looks unimpressed when he turns around again. “How should I know? You’ve never shown interest in anyone.”
“Exactly. I’m not about to start now.” He sighs. “If you find him so handsome then go for it. He likes women.”
“I’m not into younger guys but thanks.” Seulgi snorts and pushes a teapot into his chest. “Bring this to our guest, will you?”
Kyungsoo walks into the living room, still feeling annoyed by Seulgi’s ridiculous assumptions but it fades away when he’s greeted by the sight of Jongin playing with Naeun and her dolls. Taeil sits next to her and is still hiding a little from Jongin.
Jongin looks up when Kyungsoo steps closer to put the teapot down where the kids won’t be able to reach and knock it over. He smiles a little nervously, like he’s expecting Kyungsoo to tell him off for playing with the kids but it’s honestly just warming his heart. “I brought you tea.” Kyungsoo says and fills a cup for Jongin before handing it over to him.
“Thank you.”
Kyungsoo sits down next to them and motions for Taeil to come over to him. Taeil waddles over
and plops down in Kyungsoo’s lap. “How are you, buddy?”
“G-Good.”
Jongin briefly looks up at Taeil when the boy stutters and Kyungsoo suddenly has an idea on how to get the two to warm up to each other.
“What did you do today?” He asks Taeil.
“I p-played with E-Eunji and her d-doll house.”
Kyungsoo hums. “What else?”
“W-We p-played in the g-g-ga-” Sometimes Taeil’s stutter gets so bad that he can’t finish a sentence or get the word he wants to say out. Like right now. Taeil makes a frustrated sound.
“It’s okay, buddy. Try again.” Kyungsoo mumbles but Taeil shakes his head. “Why not?”
“B-Because h-he’s here.” Taeil points at Jongin who’s been watching them silently. “H-He’s g- going to l-laugh at me.”
“No he won’t.” Kyungsoo assures him and looks up at Jongin who’s looking at Taeil with a strange expression. “Right, Jongin?”
“Of course not.” Jongin says. He tilts his head down a little so he can look at Taeil’s face. “I used to stutter too when I was little, you know?”
Bull’s eye.
Taeil looks at Jongin with wide eyes. “R-Really? B-But y-you d-don’t stutter n-now.”
“That’s because I practiced a lot to get rid of it.” Jongin explains.
“T-The h-hyungs m-make fun o-of me all t-the time.” Taeil mumbles.
Jongin gives him a solemn smile. “I know. It’s okay. They used to make fun of me too.”
Kyungsoo smiles to himself, glad that his plan worked out because after that, Taeil switches places and sits down on Jongin’s lap instead. Taeil suddenly acts like Jongin is his biggest hero and he won’t let go of him but it doesn’t look like Jongin minds it that much. He smiles and laughs with the little boy and pats his head.
He tells Taeil that he has to be brave when the bullies tease him and that he can get over his stutter if he’s strong and Taeil says he’s stronger than Iron Man.
Kyungsoo watches them interact with a weird feeling in his chest. He watches how Jongin brushes an eyelash from the little boy’s cheek so gently as if he’s touching something really fragile. Jongin looks up once and catches Kyungsoo staring. He gives him a timid smile and Kyungsoo suddenly finds it hard to focus on anything else but the way Jongin’s eyes crinkle when he smiles.
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